Grief
by imre infinite
Summary: When Max Mizuhara was four years old, he was diagnosed with cancer. Nine years later, he had went through the process four times. He had only one month left until he would be officially free from cancer. But then it comes back. How will they all cope?


**Pairing:** Main pairing: Max/Takao (friendship only). Side pairing: Kai/Takao & Rei/Max

**Warning:** Character Death, YAOI.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own the Beyblade charecters, Takao Aoki does.  
**A/N:** My first Beyblade fic, dedicated to my awesome friend R.M.L(robbxmonxlover), even though she didn't want anyone to die. Sorry 'bout that, but I'm in a killing mood, lulz. Okay, over to the story. Enjoy.

Max Mizuhara was at the local hospital. He hadn't felt good lately, and his doctor had called him and asked him to come down to see him. Uncomfortable he shifted in his seat, pretending to listen to what his doctor, Sazuke, told him. He knew what was happening now. He knew that his life was ruined, again. He knew that the possibilities for him _ever_ having a normal life again, was like zero. He knew that he was sick again.

Max interrupted doctor Sazuke. "So what you're saying is that cancer's back?"

Max gazed at his doctor, trying to find any sign that this might just be a lie. None.

"Yes, I am sorry Max, but that is the case," doctor Sazuke said with a small smile that said 'I feel pity for you'. Max hated that smile. What was there to smile about? He had just found out that he'd might die anytime soon!

"… but I only have one month left. One _fucking_ month! And now you are telling me that it was all for granted?!" Mac was shouting now, tears building up in his eyes.

Max buried his head in his hands and started sobbing. His father patted him sympathetic on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.

"Don't worry, Maxie. It'll be okay," he said and showed away Max's blond hair.

Oh, how he would miss his hair.

"We have a room for you. If you would just come back tomorrow, and your treatment will start almost right away. No need to worry, Mr Mizuhara. Your son will be okay in no time," doctor Sazuke said, and yet again smiled his stupid pity smile.

Max tried to smile back, but it was ratter a foolish grimace.

"Have a nice day, Max. Mr Mizuhara," the black-haired doctor said.

"Yeah, right," Max, replied angrily, before walking out from the office followed by his father.

In silence the two Mizuhara's drove home. Yet again Max was standing in his room packing his cloths, his beyblade and everything else that meant so much to him.

He looked at the green beyblade. "So much for that dream," he whispered and put it in his bag. He sighted heavily and kept packing.

It was getting pretty late when he was done. He looked around in his room. This wasn't his room, at least it didn't look like it. All his stuff was gone. Even the picture of him, Rei, Kai, Takao and Kyouju were packed away now, and that had never left it place before.

That reminded him that he had to actually _tell_ his friends about the cancer.

Half an hour later, Max is sitting on his bed with his friends in front of him.

"Dude, what's happened here?" Takao said once he saw the empty room. "Your not… moving are you?"

Max shock his head. "No, I'm not moving… At least not in that way. But… I were at the hospital today."

Rei sat down at the bed next to him and pulled him into him self. He had understood what happened. Takao on the other hand, he wasn't sure what this was about.

He was about to asked something, but Kai nudged him. "What?" Takao said annoyed.

"Don't you get it?" Kyouju said and took a step closer to the bed, looking sympathetic at his friend.

"Cancer's back, Takao," Max said low, fighting his tears.

Rei pulled Max even closer, and hugged him comforting. "It's okay, Max."

But it wasn't okay. How could it be okay? He was deathly ill! However, all Max could do was do enjoy the embrace, and hope that the older boy was right. The room were in complete silence, no one knew what to say. Kai was just standing there, having one of the few moments where he had nothing to say. Takao looked as if his whole world was falling apart, Max was his all time best friend. Kyouju looked as if he was about to faint, and sat down on the floor. Rei just rocked his boyfriend, keeping him calm. No sound escaped for several minutes.

Takao was the first to break the silence. "I'm so sorry Max."

Max was at the hospital together with his friends and his father. Doctor Sazuke followed them through the hall until he at last stopped in front of room 483. He opened the door, and let the boys in. "This will be your room for now, Max."

Max didn't say anything, didn't nod ether, but just looked around.

It was two beds there, one already occupied by a black-haired boy who apparently slept, two nightstands, a and several other things that was there to make the room homey. But Max knew that no matter what they did, a hospital room could not be homey.

"I guess this is it…" Max finally said as he put aside his back and sat down on the free bed with a small thump.

Just then a female nurse came in. She had bright red hair, obviously dyed, and almost black eyes. She smiled friendly and looked at the boys.

"Max Mizuhara?" she asked with a soft voice, trying to figure who of them he was.

"That's me," Max replied and stood up.

"It's very nice to meet you, Max. My name is Okimi, I will be the one taking care of you on an everyday basis," the nurse, Okimi apparently said and smiled softly.

"Nice to meet you," Max said, not thinking it was nice at all. He didn't want to meet her, because he only met her because of that fucking disease he had.

"Well, Max – your treatment will soon begin. I suggest that you say good bye to your friends, and a doctor will be with you in a minute," nurse Okimi said, before disappearing out the door.

"Well… I guess this is good bye then," Max whispered, not meeting his friends eyes.

Rei walked up to him, kissing him softly on the cheek. "I'll come visit as soon as possible, Maxie," he promised.

Max smiled and hugged the other boy. "I'll miss you, Rei."

He then hugged Takao and tried to keep his tears away. It was hard enough to not be able to see his boyfriend everyday, but when he couldn't see his best friend ether, it was just to hard. "I'll miss you mate. You too, Kyouju. Kai."

After saying good-bye to his friends, they were showed out of the room by Okimi, who had come back with a doctor.

"You must be Max. I doctor Mori. If you will follow be, we will run some tests to find the best treatment," he said and gestured Max to follow him out of the room.

Max was back in his room, the black-haired boy still sleeping, and doctor Mori was standing in front of him.

"Well, tomorrow your treatment will start. You will maybe lose your hair, and you might feel a bit sick, and-…" Max interrupter his doctor.

"I know the side affects. If you look in my journal, you can see that this is the fifth time I have cancer," Max said, not wanting to listen to all the side affects again. He had heard them so many times before.

"Yes, of course. I just thought you might have forgotten," doctor Mori said apologizing.

"_How can I forget?_" Max mumbled under his breath.

Max sighted and looked around out the window.

"Well, you should get some sleep, you probably know that the treatment can be very hard on people. Good night, Max," doctor Mori said, before leaving the room.

When the door was closed, Max changed into his pajamas, and went to bed. However he could not sleep. The fact that he might anytime soon would die, didn't leave his mind.

It was almost sunrise when Max finally fell asleep.

Max woke up only a few hours after he had fallen asleep. Nurse Okimi was standing in between the two beds and putting trails with food on each of the nightstands.

"Oh, good morning, Max. Have you been sleeping well?" nurse Okimi asked warmly.

Max nodded, even thought that was not the case. He had sleeping very bad, dreaming that Rei had dumped him because he didn't want a boyfriend with cancer. Rei had instead started dating Takao, because _he_ was well. The image of Rei and Takao kissing wouldn't leave Max's mind. On top of it all, Kai and Kyouju had been a couple, ignoring Max completely. The four of his friends had come to visit him and asked him what color he wanted his coffin to be.

Now Max was afraid that Rei would dump him for Takao, ignoring Max completely.

"Now, I'll be back in about an hour, meanwhile you two should get to know each other," nurse Okimi smiled before leaving the boys.

"I'm Yoji Matreya Brass," the black-haired boy smiled enthusiastic. "But you can call me Yoji."

Max looked at Yoji, how could he be so… happy? He had cancer, he would might die, and yet he smiled as if it was his birthday or something.

"I'm Max Mizuhara," Max said, not even close to the enthusiasm Yoji had.

"Hey, cheer up! It's be over before you know it!" Yoji said with a bright smile.

"For me it just seems to come back every time it looks good," Max mumbled.

Yoji smiled sympathetic. "You've had cancer before, haven't you?" he asked as he started on his breakfast.

"Yeah… this is my fifth time," Max said, trying to make it sound like it was no big deal.

But the fact was; it was a big deal. Max would never get used to it, he was always surprised when he woke up, and the cancer was still there. He always half expected it to all just be a bad dream, but it never was.

"Wow… It's my first time," Yoji said, still eating.

Max started his breakfast as well, and didn't say anything after that.

An hour later, nurse Okimi came back just as she said. In front of her, she had a trail with several syringe's and other things.

"Max, you know the process, so I'll begin with you. Yoji, if you pay attention now, you will see what will happen. You know the side affects?"

Yoji nodded and walked over to Max's bed to get a better view. Nurse Okimi found one of the syringes and asked Max to pull up his sleeve. When Max did so, she cleaned his arm with an invisible liquid before she placed the needle to Max's arm. The liquid inside the syringe was pressed inside Max's arm, and the chemotherapy was over for today.

"Now, that wasn't as bad as you expected?" nurse Okimi smiled before doing the same process on Yoji, who wasn't as calm as Max about it.

The younger boy pressed his eyes together as he breathed heavily. When nurse Okimi was done, he managed to press a few words out. "Fright of needles…" he mumbled embarrassed.

"Don't worry, kid. You'll get used to the syringe's after a while," Max ensured.

A week had gone since Max was placed at the hospital. Today his friends was coming to visit. When nurse Okimi announced their appearance, Max was surprised to see them carrying several flowers, boxes with chocolate(which Max would ratter not have, as he was sick from the chemotherapy) and cards.

"Maxie!" Takao squealed as he saw his friend.

He put the flowers he held on Max's nightstand, before hugging his friend tight.

"I've missed you, mate!" Takao exclaimed and hugged him again.

"I've missed you too!" Max said, smiling firmly and looked at his friends.

Rei put a box of chocolate next to the flowers("You're mother asked me to give it to you, she is coming tomorrow" he said) before walking over to his boyfriend.

Max looked at him. God he had missed him.

"Your not dating Takao, are you?" he asked after a moment with silence.

"WHAT?!" Takao yelled and took a few steps away. "No, no, no, NO!"

Max sighted heavily and kissed Rei. "Thank God, because that's what I've been dreaming lately."

Rei looked at Max. "I would never date _that_," he said and pointed at Takao ("Hey!" Takao exclaimed offended).

Max rested his head on Rei's shoulder, before looking at the two boys he hadn't said anything to yet.

"Kyouju, how much I have missed you geekiness!" Max exclaimed and grinned at the short boy standing next to Kai with several cards, obviously from several other than himself.

"I'm pretending I didn't hear that one," Kyouju said, but smiled.

Kai looked at Max. "Get well, will you? Takao is getting on my nerves with his worries," Kai joked and smiled weirdly.

God, how Max had missed his friends. Rei showed away Max's hair from his forehead so that he could kiss him, but as she showed it away – he really _showed_ it away. Max had no longer any fringe. "Max… you lost you hair…" Rei said carefully.

Max looked at the blond locks of his that now was in Rei's hand. At first it looked as if he was about to cry, but then he inhaled and exhaled. "It was bound to happen, wasn't it?"

He sighted heavily and looked down. He didn't like that part, losing his hair. It wasn't the worst part, but it wasn't good.

To get his mind on other stuff, he started asking them how the beyblading was going.

"We're doing good, but it's not the same with out you, mate," Takao said.

Time went by, but the only change was that Max was paler, balder and sicker. The treatment didn't make him better. He was just worse. He felt as if he was half dead, and on bad days, he just looked out in the room, not talking to the visitors he had.

When he one month into the treatment, was lying in his bed, with Takao sitting next to him trying to make him talk, he started thinking.

Why was he taking those stupid syringes? Why was he taking his tablets? Why was he here? So that he once again could come home, just to find out cancer was back and having to go through the rough process again? What was the point? Making his friends and family happy? But were they happy? When they came to visit, they were always smiling, but Max could see right through them. They were sad inside, because they could all see that Max was dead, at least almost. They all knew that he would be dead by the end of the year, if not before.

It was November, and Takao was taking about a tournament they were thinking about entering. He was wondering if Max was okay with them going with out them. It was only an amateur tournament that a few kids in the neighborhood had asked them to join.

"Yeah, sure. Just join in…" Max said emotionless.

"Are you sure, Max? I mean, nether of us think it will be as good with out you. We're missing a part of our team. We really want you there, you know. But Kai thinks that if we don't somehow get's back in the game, it will be lost for ever," Takao said, trying to make Max look at him.

But Max was just looking at the wall in front of him.

"Don't worry about me. I'm fine," he said, but Takao could see that he was anything but okay.

Max was just lying there in his bed. Day in, day out. Only eating a bit, taking his med's and sleeping. When he talked, it was as if he was in trace. The good old Max was gone in between all the medications.

Takao finally gave up, and left at last. Max went back to a sleep full of nightmares, however – every time Max awoke, he couldn't remember what he had dreamt.

It was early December when Max had made his decision. Just after Yoji checked out of the hospital, having five years before he would be officially well, Max asked for doctor Mori. When he half an hour later entered the room whom now belonged to Max only, he looked at Max.

"I'm sorry that I'm late, Max. Now, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" doctor Mori asked as he read Max's journal.

"I've been thinking a lot. This is the fifth time I have cancer. It just seems to come back, no matter how many treatments I get," Max said and sighted. "I have decided that I don't want anymore treatment. I want to go home."

Doctor Mori looked at Max. He sat down on a chair next to Max's bed.

"You are aware of that if you leave now, you will actually _die_?" doctor Mori asked.

Max nodded. "I know that, but I'm tired now. As my doctor I ask you, pleace!"

After a while the doctor nodded. "I hope you understand what you are doing, but I am in no position to deny you. I will call you father right away. Do you want to tell him your self, or should I?"

"I'll do it," Max simply said.

Max had told his father about his decision, and even though he was heartbroken, he understood the decision of his son. Max was now facing the biggest challenge; telling his friends. He didn't know how they would react. After all, he was telling them about his own death.

Takao, Rei, Kai and Kyouju was sitting on each a chair looking at Max.

"So… what's up? Are you coming home? Your well again?" Takao asked, smiling in hope.

Max sighted. "I am coming home, but I'm not well."

Rei looked confused, as did the others. "What do you mean, Max? Why are you coming home when your not well? are you getting home treatment?" Rei asked.

Max shook his head. "I'm not getting anymore treatment."

Takao's mouth fell open. "What?!"

Max's friends looked like four big questions marks.

"You can't do that! You'll die!" Kyouju exclaimed scared.

"I know that I'll die. But you have to understand, guys!" Max said loudly "Since I was four years old I have been struggling with this disease! I'm tired… I don't want to fight anymore. During the past month I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I came to a conclusion; no matter how hard I fight, how good medication I get and how many times I might beat cancer – it will always come back. It just won't leave. And now… I'm tired. I don't want do to this anymore. I'd much ratter stop the medication, go home and celebrate my last Christmas with my family and friends, thank lying in this stupid hospital bed for the rest of my life, hoping that _maybe_ one day a million years in the future, I will be well again."

"But Max! You can't just leave us here!" Takao yelled, now sobbing. He didn't want his friend to just give up the fight.

"Please, Takao. Don't make this any harder than it already is," Max begged. "I love you, Takao! You're my best friend, but this is the way it has to be."

Rei pulled Max into his chest and hugged him. "If this is what you want, I will be with you until the very end," he said rocking back and forth.

Kyouju was crying silently, hiding it behind his glasses. The only one who wasn't crying was Kai. He looked sad, but no tears escaped. Instead, he patted the sobbing Takao on the back and trying to calm him down.

Christmas was there, and Max was celebrating with his family and friends. Gifts were exchanged, they laughed, they smiled and they ate, but Max could see that everybody was a bit sad. Max was getting paler and paler, and his face looked older. The little hair he had, looked dead. In fact, the only thing that didn't look dead, was his eyes. He was smiling brightly; he was happy that he wasn't sick from chemotherapy and couldn't eat. He was happy that he wasn't in the hospital, eating stupid hospital food.

"To Max," Mr Mizuhara said and raised his glass in a toast. Max knew that he in his head added "Because this is his last Christmas". Everybody raised their glasses and repeated "To Max".

It was only ten o'clock when Max got tired. He was tired a lot now, he used a lot of strength when he didn't take his medications. Rei followed him into his room, and sat down next to him in his bed.

"I love you Max, I'll miss you. When your… gone I mean," Rei said, having trouble thinking about the time that soon would knock on their doors. If he only knew how soon it would be.  
"I love you to, Rei," Max said before falling asleep.

"Wake up, Max!" Rei said eleven o'clock the next morning. He had slept over, not wanting to miss any second of the last part of Max's life.

Max didn't move. Rei walked over to him and shock him. "Wake up, Maxie. You're breakfast is ready!"

But still Max didn't move. Rei kept shaking Max, even though he could feel the cold skin.

Max was dead.

"Max! Please, wake up!" Rei yelled, almost sounding angry.

Mr Mizuhara entered the room. "What is going on in here? Is everything -…" He stopped talking when he saw the pale boy lying in his bed.

"Oh God…" he said almost falling to the floor. "Judy!"

Judy came walking into the room. "What is it?" she asked, but then she saw the dead body lying in the bed. "Oh my…" she exclaimed before tears running down her cheek.

"Oh my… Maxie!" she cried drying her tears, but in no use as only new once appeared.

Rei was only standing there, as if he didn't understand what was going on.

It was the day of the funeral. Max's parents was sitting on the front row of the church next to Kyouju, Kai, Takao and Rei, all of them in black suits, Judy in a black dress.

Takao was crying, Kai embracing him and whispering comforting words. Kyouju was sobbing into his hands and Rei was just staring in front of him. No emotions showed, it was as if he wasn't there. Max's parents were crying as if it was the end of the world.

The church was full. The All Starz where there, the Blitzkrieg Boys where there and several other of the teams Max had known when he was alive.

"Now Mr Mizuhara would like to say a few words," the priest exclaimed.

Mr Mizuhara stood up, dried his tears and walked over to the microphone.

"Max was always such a nice boy, always thinking the best in everybody and everything. He could even find good sides of cancer, at least that's what he told us, but I suspect that those might was lies," Mr Mizuhara said. "He was a great beyblader, everybody knew that. He wasn't old when he came to he and told be that when he grew up he wanted to be the worlds best beyblader. He was pretty far on the way as well. He and his friends was touring around when he was only 11 years old. I was very proud of him.

"I remember when Max came up to me and said he was in love. He had been so happy for weeks, and then he finally told me. 'I'm in love, dad," he said. I looked ratter surprised. 'So who's the lucky girl?', when I said this Max had laughed. 'It's Rei,' he exclaimed. This was a big surprise to me, but I remember Max being so happy, so I had no problem accepting the news. Max made those things so easy.

"When Max was four, the cancer came. I remember him not understanding why he was put in the hospital away from me and his mother. But he was quick to get well again, and he was back home. When he was seven, he was back in the hospital. This time he refused to go. He ran away. It took us hours to find him, but it turned out he was only hiding underneath Takao's bed," Mr Mizuhara said, and smiled between his sobs. "Only a year later he was back in the hospital, but it didn't take him long to get well. At the age of ten he was put in again. He was getting sick of it, but refused to stop fighting. He was only a month away from being well, when cancer stroke him again. He was devastated. This time he was sick and tired of fighting, and early in December he broke the news to us; he was coming home and ending the treatment. I don't think any of us quit understood, but we all accepted it. Max said he was tired, and we respected that.

"This might sound mean, but when I think about it – Max did the right think by ending the treatment. His last month was the happiest of his life, I noticed that. I think it was because he didn't need to worry about the cancer anymore. He knew that it would take him sooner or later, and he just wanted to enjoy his life. And he did. I can't remember him wasting a single moment of that month. We were all very sad on the 26th. Max had left us behind. We lost an amazing person; a son, a friend and a boyfriend. I know that he will be deeply missed, but as Max said only two days before his death: 'When I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn. Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling, and now I can't feel a thing, so just smile back.'" Mr Mizuhara said and ended his speech.

Several in the crowd cried. Mr Mizuhara, two of Max's uncles and Rei walked over to the coffin which Max now lay in, and lifted it. They carried to white coffin out of the church, and soon it was placed into the ground. Max Mizuhara was buried.

A month at passed since Max's funeral. Judy was still in Japan, not being able to leave the county just yet.

Takao cried a lot, and Kai comforted him a lot. Kyouju was spending a lot of time with Takao and Kai, and Rei if it counted.

Rei was still emotionless. Days passed with out him really noticing. He was lifeless.

Early in February, Kai, Takao, Kyouju and Rei were sitting in what used to be Max's room. They spend a lot of time there, not wanting to leave it.

"We're going to the graveyard. Are you coming?" Kai asked Rei.

Rei just nodded and followed his friends out of the room, still with out showing any emotions. Takao on the other hand had started sobbing again. Kai and Takao was walking in front of Rei and Kyouju, Kai with his hands around the other boy's shoulder.

"I just can't believe he's gone…" Takao sobbed.

"Me nether… But I feel so sorry for Rei, he's devastated!" Kai said and kissed Takao's cheek.

When they arrived with the graveyard, they walked around the graves until they was standing in front of Max's. He had a gravestone now.

_Max Mizuhara_

_June 2d 1995 – December 26__th__ 2009_

_Beloved son, friend and boyfriend.  
Rest in Peace_

Rei looked at the stone, read through it several time until his legs couldn't hold him any longer and he fell to the ground. For the first time since Mac died, he cried. And cried.

"He's really dead…" he sobbed hugging himself and rocking back and forth on the ground.

Kai let go of Takao, and helped Rei up. Rei flung his arms around him sobbing loudly. Kai patted his shoulder. "Its okay, Rei. Let it out."

Now as Rei had first started to cry, he couldn't stop. He cried and cried and cried, mumbling in Chinese.

_Five Years Later_

Rei was at the graveyard, holding a red rose in his hand. He placed it on Max's grave.

"Hello, Max. Today Takao and Kai got engaged! I know, not what you'd expect when they first met, huh?" Rei laughed a bit. "Well, their at least happy, so I am as well. Kyouju was asked to be Takao's bestman, and I'm Kai's. Their wedding will be in two months. Talk about moving fast! Oh, and guess what! _Kyouju_ won against Takao in beyblading! He have been practicing like a madman! You should have seen Takao's face! I personally think it was only good luck, but of course I didn't tell Takao that. It'll do him good to lose a bit. But now I have to go,"

Rei walked a few meters away from the grave, but turned around. "I love you," he whispered before he left.

**A/N: **First of all, I don't know when Max was born, so I there for just did it as if he died this year, as a thirteen year old. And if any of the numbers doesn't work with what I write, I excuse that with my bad math-skills. Just let me know, and I will try to fix it.

I'm sorry for killing Max, by the way. I love him, but it had to happen.

Okayyy… I don't think there is anything more I need to say. Just because I want to say it; I started this fic 11 PM, and now it's… oh fuck, it's 3 AM, and I really need to go to bed…. Night!


End file.
